TinselTown Trash

Archive for January, 2009

What the heck is up with Jewel’s boob?

Don’t you love it when Brooke Hogan takes her friends out shopping?

I think we need a paternity test to see who the father of those puppies is. Speaking of paternity tests, the way Brooke Hogan is filling out, are we sure she is Hulk Hogan’s daughter? She seems to get hotter and hotter everytime I see her and she doesn’t seem to be losing any hair.

Talk about a train wreck. Just look at Miley Cyrus.

Miley is getting out of control. Billy Ray needs to get some new locks or something. Heck, I can recommend some of the best door hardware if he is having a problem keeping her out of trouble. Then again, maybe he doesn’t want to keep her out of trouble. What better way to shed the whole Hannah Montana persona? Right?

Do you remember the name of those fish you put in your fishtank that stick to the sides and suck all the scum off the side of the tank?

I might be mistaken, but I am pretty sure they are not called Nikki Cox. Her lips remind me of those clips you use when you wear tuxedos to keep the cummerbund in place, or whatever.

The sensual Megan Fox.

There’s more than one bikini girl on American Idol. Surprise, it’s Casey Carlson.

Mary Louise Parker is looking fantastic.

Annalynne McCord is looking quite thexual, even though she looks like she takes diet pills. No one in Hollywood, except maybe Keira Knightley is uber-skinny without the aid of diet pills.

If I had the choice though, I would pick Annalynne. At least she has her sensual moments. Keira is just… skinny. All the time. And that kind of freaks me out.

Whitney Port must have forgotten about the paparazzi.

I present the titillating Lacey Chabert.